Go by Jonsi: The Music of Spring

Is this real paint or Photoshop?

Even if you're not already a fan of Jonsi via Sigur Ros I highly recommend giving at least some of these breathtakingly beautiful songs a listen. Whether it be a fast paced, sometimes frenetic song like Go Do, the breakneck craziness of Animal Arithmetic or a mellow emotional song like Grow Till Tall or Tornado each song seems to almost fly by as the ethereal qualities begin to overwhelm the listener. It's so good and so enjoyable that it makes one want to rush outside and breathe in all the wild growth of spring before it melts into summer.

There have always been naysayers who claim that a solo album from a front man of an already successful band will inevitably be watered down, weaker or only a slightly tweaked version of the original bands' music. And that's a valid critique, but not in this case. Yes, he sings in his haunting falsetto a lot, just like he does with Sigur Ros. And yes, the music is very good. But the similarities really end there. Go features much faster rhythms, heavier synthesizers, a lot more orchestral work,  less guitar and one other glaring difference between Go and the music of Sigur Ros.

Jonsi sings more than a little of the lyrics in English. It's English sung with a heavy, but not overpowering, Icelandic accent, granted. But it's beautiful and can be understood once the listener has gotten over the newness of the album and has learned how to listen to his pronunciations. I don't find it unpleasant at all to not always know exactly what he's singing about. In fact, it adds to the over all aesthetic, to the air of mystery and otherworldly quality. That said, the lyrics are beautiful so it's not a bad idea to look them up.

From Go Do:

Tie strings to clouds
Make your own lake - Let it flow
Throw seeds to sprout
Make your own break - Let them grow

And from Animal Arithmetic:

Every time, everyone, everything's full of life
Everyday, everywhere, people are so alive

I see you in the trees
I see you're colourful
I see you in the breeze
You're spiritful

Personally, I've officially recognized Go as the soundtrack of my springtime. In fact, I've become rather obsessed by it! Never before in my life have I been so eager for the warmth and growth of spring and this album encapsulates all the glory, wonder, beauty and sometimes heady pace of springtime. It's as if the spring flowers and awakening animals and I are racing at a feverish pace and this album is the music we are making.

I wanted to imbed the video for Go Do but YouTubers don't seem to want to share it and the Jonsi site features a huge video player that uglies up my template. So, go here to see the first fascinating video from Go.

Spring: Flowers, Critters and Blog Templates, etc.

Grape Hyacinths

So you may have noticed I've been playing with my template, backgrounds and stuff around here. What can I say? I recently got a nice, fully functioning, big ass monitor (from some great friends!!) and can now enjoy all the colors of the rainbow. Also, Blogger just unrolled their new Template Designer in Blogger in Draft and it is very nice. And fun. And addictive. But, more to the point (and there is one coming, just hold on) it's Spring!

All the warm weather critters are returning with the birds coming first. In fact, birds are returning in droves these days. We've had the mourning doves for about a week and their song is only second to the whip-poor-whil. Our local mockingbird returned a couple of days ago and, when he's close enough to a bedroom window, makes for an efficient and enjoyable alarm clock.   Every time I step outside I see more birds and even saw one squirrel which we don't often have around here. Haven't had a snake yet but it won't be long. The pond frogs have been serenading us for a few weeks now and it's truly glorious.

Lilacs and Tulips

There are spring flowers popping up all over in old and new places. We've got all of our expected things putting on a show but we've got a stray lilac or tulip here and there. Looks like our daffodils are done, the lilacs are still going and the tulips are just beginning to show off their rainbow of colors. All kinds of things are popping up: wild violas amongst the grass, gorgeous bright yellow dandelions and the wild rose bushes are putting out lots of growth. I can't wait to float in the pool and smell the gorgeousness of their scent waft over me. Warm weather can't come soon enough for me this year it seems. And I know why.

Now that my family situation is so much more healthy and happy than it was up until last fall I'm just looking so forward to life and living. My family was locked in a deep, dark hole for a long time, myself included. So I'm loving having freedom to have a life and friendships and goals and hopes to actually look toward.  I've been locked up too long. I, more or less voluntarily, did the hermit thing for nearly 30 years and spent the last two or three too scared to hardly ever leave the house. And now I'm done with that.  I'm stepping out of my cage.

I'm making new friends, pagan and non-pagans, left and right and, for the first time in my life, I'm actually enjoying hanging out with people. It's still a rough ride as my social skillz are pretty rusty but I'm having fun. And it's great. I'm drinking up the sun because the better times have arrived! If you have the means I highly recommend enjoying some beautiful weather and time outdoors and just plain 'ol good times with those you love. Enjoy the springtime, my fellow northern hemisphere residents,  for it comes but once a year!

These Dreams

A few years back I had a dream blog. I started it for a variety of reasons, but mostly because writing my dreams down by hand took much longer than it took to type them. I only posted in my dream blog for a few months before I moved on to other things and ditched it. But I've been thinking of starting a new dream blog for a while and I've been getting signals from the universe for a few weeks that a closer examination of my dreams would be a good idea. A startling dream here and there, dream related articles that pop out of seeming nothingness and other signs of synchronicity have been making themselves known to me.

I've done some digging and found that I am not the only weirdo who wants to keep an online dream journal. There are tons of dream journals out there ranging from the very visual yet amazingly language based to those with only the bare facts. In fact, I've found a great site called, you guessed it, Dream Journal and I'm really liking it so far. I know it makes me a traitor to the almighty Blogger but this is a unique site that keeps track of specific facts like whether the dream occurred indoors or in the past, if you were lucid, the setting and feelings, etc., and allows the user to see trends and themes over time. It also offers some interpretive help as well as opening up your dream to the interpretations of other dream bloggers. There's a forum and all kinds of other groovy, helpful things on the site; I highly recommend it. There are a few ads but they're tasteful and not obnoxious so I don't really mind considering the benefits. It's a helluva lot better and much more useful than a handwritten dream journal in my opinion; at least it is to me. So, without further ado I'd like to introduce My Dream Journal.

Green Air and White Nights

I think it's a line from the first book of The Lord of the Rings in which Tom Bombadil mentions the healing and rejuvenating power of "the green smell" and the wonder and joy to be found in nature. The feeling around here these days is a perfect example of that. We had a blessedly comfortable Fourth of July with the air full of smoke and the scent of green growth. We had the nearly full moon on the left of our viewing area and a gathering storm on our right. The brightness of the moon, the lightning of the thunderhead and fireworks everywhere in between coupled with the surprising not-scorching heat made for a very pleasant and visually stimulating holiday. It's indicative of the recent weather and lush greenness of life in these hills lately. While my health has been less-than-perfect, to say the least, lately every time I step outside I feel myself immediately wrapped in a cocoon of green healing energy. The very air seems green and full of potential and while that doesn't solve any of my problems it gives me hope.

It never ceases to amaze me, this phenomena of trees and flowers and the wide open sky instantly lifting my spirits and inspiring me. I can be deep in an unpleasant, unhappy funk and one brief sighting of a crane flying past a brilliant sunset can put the silliest grin on my face. My spirits can be down in the dumps and just a few minutes of owl or whip-poor-will song has me smiling like an idiot. When I get so frantic and jittery that I can't sit still all it takes is a half-hour walk around our immense back yard with the dogs to calm me down and help me find my center. And if I ever find myself wondering why I don't feel as good as I should I just have to remember that, for some reason or another, I haven't communed with the moon for a while.

I hate the time of the new moon. I hate it when I can't speak with Luna. Don't get me wrong, I totally understand the phases of the moon and why we have to have three moonless nights a month. I'm not hating on the nature of the solar system. And I also recognize, with gusto, the significance and power of the moon in all her phases. I recognize and revere Hecate, and her magic, just as much as any other self-respecting witch. But I miss the moon so much when I can't see her. I hate cloudy nights and I hate new moon time for the same reason: I can't see her and I can't feel her anywhere near as keenly as I do when I can see her. Intellectually, I know that even though I cannot see her with my puny human eyes that she is still there. I know she is there during the day but the sun is too bright and won't allow me to see her. I know she is there when nighttime clouds obscure her. And I know she is there during her new phase. I know this. But it doesn't make it any easier.

I don't think I can explain rationally with facts and figures; it's entirely subjective. When it comes to the natural world I truly am a Missourian: I want you to show me! Or at least, when it comes to bird song, let me hear it for myself. I must smell it, feel it, experience it for myself or its meaningless. Okay, it's not meaningless. But without personal firsthand sensory experience I receive no direct and immediate benefit from it. When I can't see the moon, or be outside and smell the green smell, just knowing it's out there doesn't really mean much. It's like reading a nature magazine. It can be fascinating, it can be very educational and it can spurn me into action. It can broaden my horizons and lead me to new pursuits and new interests, but it doesn't heal my soul or my spirit. It doesn't lift me out of a foul mood and it doesn't inspire me. I guess what I'm saying is that learning about nature teaches my brain and that's all well and good. But being outside and experiencing nature through my own senses teaches my soul. And, for that, I will be eternally in awe.

Here, Have Some Beck

I know I haven't been posting, or commenting, all that much lately but you're just gonna have to cut me some slack. It's hot as hell and I've got some (hopefully minor) health concerns to deal with right now. So, here, have some Beck. He mentions pagans in this song but, as with most Beck tunes, I have no idea what the fuck he's talking about. Feel free to cuss and discuss. This is a live version of Jack Ass. The original, from Odelay, is much more mellow and trippy but this is great too. Enjoy.



I been drifting along
In the same stale shoes
Loose ends tying a noose
In the back of my mind
If you thought that you were making your way
To where the puzzles and pagans lay
I'll put it together:
It's a strange invitation
When I wake up
Someone will sweep up my lazy bones
And we will rise in the cool of the evening
I remember the way that you smiled
When the gravity shackles were wild
And something is vacant
When I think it's all beginning

I been drifting along
In the same stale shoes
Loose ends tying the noose
In the back of my mind
If you thought that you were making your way
To where the puzzles and pagans lay
I'll put it together:
It's a strange invitation

Weather Weirdness

Have you ever had a moment, or moments, when something outside or otherwise nature-related that normally brought you joy not only gave you the willies but maybe scared the holy shit out of you? I had a moment like that last week during one of several storms systems that passed through our area. I call our little spot of land Windy Hill for obvious reasons. And we take full advantage of our often blustery weather i.e. we have zillions of wind chimes. Okay, maybe not zillions but dozens.

Almost every corner of all four buildings has a set of chimes hanging from it and the big covered back porch has at least a dozen of its own chimes. So, even when it's just a bit breezy we have the blessed, joyful, uplifting song of wind chimes filtering through the air and the trees. At any point on the property one can always hear wind chimes. The rare occasions when the air is completely still usually occur in the dead of winter. There's also a weird thing that happens just before, sometimes during, or after a thunderstorm hits: sometimes the wind abruptly dies. This is most likely to happen at the freaky time when cigar clouds are trying to stir up tornadoes.

This is what happened one evening last week. I was back by the barn, the front end, not the back end that our last tornado ripped up, and I was joyfully taking pictures of all the freaky, gorgeous and frightening clouds moving past. Say what you will about thunderstorms and tornadoes, and I have, but they make for great photography. Anyway, the wind had been picking up and the clouds were spiraling and turning and churning like they do sometimes before a tornado drops down when everything went dead.

Our near-constant breeze suddenly stopped. It was as if the local spirits, or fairies or Those Who Are in Charge of Air got a punch in the gut and lost their breath. For a few minutes the atmosphere stopped breathing. And just before everything went still and got stuffy the wind chime right behind me gave a small and sad little tinkling of sound as if trying to defy the danger of the storm. It was chilling. You ever have a moment like that?

The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Or, If You Still Aren't Recycling Here's a DAMN GOOD REASON to Start

What is the Great Pacific Garbage Patch, you say? Well, it's a huge floating pile of trash all clobbered together in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. What is it? It's mostly plastics. Plastics like that water bottle you just threw in the trash. Plastics like that wrapper you just threw out the window. Plastics like that gallon jug you left by the creek at the camping area. It's estimated that only about 20% of the trash comes from ships. The other 80% comes from land sources, like through rivers, drainage, etc. And here's the kicker: it's big. How big, you say? It's ROUGHLY TWICE THE SIZE OF FUCKING TEXAS!

How does it stay in one general area? This article from the LA Times perhaps puts it best:

This is known as the Eastern Garbage Patch, part of a system of currents called the North Pacific subtropical gyre. Located halfway between San Francisco and Hawaii, the garbage patch is an area of slack winds and sluggish currents where flotsam collects from around the Pacific, much like foam piling up in the calm center of a hot tub.

Pretty scary, eh? And this is only the biggest patch! They exist in all the oceans all over the world!

If anyone ever needed a reason to start, and stick with, recycling this is a good one. Why aren't you recycling? Too much work, too much hassle? You have a busy life, you have lots of responsibilities, lots to see, do, learn, people to meet, etc., and you just don't have the time for it? It's not worth the effort? I wonder what the innocent animals who live in the water think of your rationalizations. Some animals, like this sea turtle, become trapped and deformed by the floating trash. Some ingest it and die either from starvation, suffocation or from the plastic painfully twisting their innards. Some get trapped in larger piles and simply can't get out, so they starve to death with a clear view of freedom and food. From the same LA Times article:

An estimated 1 million seabirds choke or get tangled in plastic nets or other debris every year. About 100,000 seals, sea lions, whales, dolphins, other marine mammals and sea turtles suffer the same fate.

And if that's not enough to get you off your ass consider this: the trash doesn't just hurt the animals within its immediate area.

Plastics are derived from petroleum. The heat of the sun, as well as ultraviolet rays, causes the plastics to break down into water and carbon dioxide thus adding to the problem of global climate change. While it's still floating the plastic blocks sunlight, interrupting the growth of algae, which also adds to the problem of global climate change. You see, algae eats carbon dioxide, loves the stuff. There are even experiments going on to feed iron to algae thus creating a boom in their growth and a lowering of carbon dioxide. It's not just the animals who are suffering. By refusing to recycle we are, in effect, killing ourselves.

If you aren't already recycling your plastics, numbers 1 and 2, start now! There's no time like the present! There are recycling centers all across this land and many, many larger towns and cities include recycling pickup with their regular trash service, often at no extra cost. What's stopping you? Yeah, it's a new routine but once you've gotten into it you will be amazed at how simple it is, how easy it is. Rinse things out, get rid of the lid and label and toss the item into a set aside recycling bin. Then, either put it on the curb or gather it all together every few months or so. You'll be doing your part to make sure the Garbage Patches of the world don't get any bigger. You'll make yourself feel good and you just might teach your kids something about environmental responsibility. Even if you don't give a shit about the animals of the oceans at least get to recycling for the sake of yourself, your own children and your race.

Damage

There's been a few new facts come to light regarding our recent severe weather here in these hills. For one thing, after spending several hours picking up many, many limbs and branches I realized that the tornado had freed our trees of their excess baggage. The Great Ice Storm of January 2007 caused incredible damage to every tree within several hundred miles of our house. There isn't a tree around here that didn't lose at least a few limbs. And even with our best efforts we just couldn't get all of them down after the weather warmed. That's been over two years ago and we were still working on getting all of those old limbs down. The tornado took care of a lot of those in one morning. So I guess one good thing came from the terror of May 8.

We've had one insurance adjuster do his thing recently, but not for the barn. Rather, this fella looked at the roof of the house, something we hadn't even really thought about considering the major structural damage to the barn. It turns out though that we had at least 75 mile an hour winds and hail that was at least as big as golf balls. So the greater part of the roof will have to be replaced. I imagine our insurance company just loves us as the only part of the roof that doesn't need replacing is the part that was replaced after the ice storm. So, two years, two storms, two huge roof jobs. I also discovered today, after pulling back the drapes, that my sliding glass doors are just about to fall to bits. They've always been ugly, with the outsides covered in white water stains, but the hail of this last storm really did a number on them. Looking back, I do remember hearing things hit them when I was waking up that day but the wind was so scary that I guess I forgot about the hail. It all adds up to a bunch of work for the insurance folks and hopefully a big enough check to repair all of the damage.

On a more introspective note, I do understand that violent weather serves many purposes. The most obvious reason, alluded to above, is just the simple idea of washing away the old thus allowing the new to come forth. Our trees don't look quite as shaggy now that most of the dead stuff has been blown off. Severe weather also goes a long way to proving to us mere, and yet endlessly arrogant humans, that we are but small parts of creation. Yes, we are sentient, we are conscious, we are mighty. We can create great things and we have a great capacity for destruction as well. But nothing beats Mama Nature, nothing! We can invest millions of dollars in research and development, we can put our best and brightest to work on new ideas and new concepts and we can build with the strongest, most advanced materials. But if she wants to do some damage one swift swipe of her arm or even a sidelong glance can unmake our greatest achievements and unbuild our greatest structures. There's no contest. We are mighty enough to make this planet dangerous to ourselves and other living beings but we can't even approach the power of She Who is In Charge.

Springborn Altar

I got a new keyboard, yay!!

The above image is my first outdoor altar that I've put together just for myself. The table top is actually marble that a good friend brought over from his place of work; it was left over after an older building was torn down or renovated, I can't remember which. The wood is from our sycamore tree that The Great Ice Storm of January 2007 took out. Since sycamore is a soft wood these blocks won't last more than a couple of years but there are always trees coming down around these parts somewhere and I have an "in" with someone who has access to trees removed by city cleanup folks. So, it's not going to be an everlasting altar but is semi-permanent. It's hard to tell from this image but most of the rocks on the ground have little, or lots, of quartz or gypsum, or both. These are rocks I took from the little stand of trees down the hill from house; it was hard work but worth it! There are also some rocks with interesting fossil imprints, a few holey river rocks and a couple of (to me) unusual rocks from Minnesota. Since I'm such a rock hound I will, of course, be adding more as time goes by. The little black thing that kinda looks like a knife is actually an old railroad tie that I saved with rustproof black paint. Ever since I found it I thought it would make a great ritual tool perhaps as a stand in for a knife or wand. However, I don't really use either in my workings so I don't know what I'll use the tie for. Maybe I'll leave it there to add to the rustic look.

I don't know why it took me so long to finally put together an outdoor altar. I've been thinking about it for year and years. I've mentioned before my disinclination, or inability, to use fancy, store bought ritual items and it still holds true. I just don't care much for the expensive, or even expensive looking, ritual tools. All of that sterling silver and brightly polished stuff usually leaves me magically cold. Yeah, it looks nice and if someone gifted me something like that I would be eternally grateful. But I just prefer old, weathered things I find along the way. The rail road tie came from the bottom of box of auction items. And many of my magical items have come from an old pickup truck that was left to rot way back behind our house. It's a really old funky truck that's at least 70 years old and chock full of treasures. Inside it was a veritable shitload of horse shoes and the remains of a big 'ol glass thermometer which I plan to dig out and add to the outdoor altar.

The vase holds a few of our roses and a bit of honeysuckle and it's just a small sampling of the wonderful blooms and blossoms to be found in these hills. I simply love how all of our neighborhood flowers are opening up. Our compost roses are going wild and our other rose bush will be covered with blooms in another week. There's pretty, but scentless, honeysuckle next to the chimney and delicious wild honeysuckle along the driveway. The peonies, planted several years ago, have finally put forth two large and intoxicating blossoms over the grave of our dear, departed Dalmatian Missy. The multi-flora wild white roses are popping out too. I love them so much and still can't believe it when people go to great lengths to kill them. They have pretty foliage, gorgeous, copious white flowers and they seem very resistant to mold and bugs. And, as if that weren't enough, they smell heavenly! Once bush can perfume an entire country yard!

Since we were nearly drowning for a few weeks everything is growing by wild leaps and bounds. We just finished mowing the other day and will have to start again this weekend. Now that we've had some dryer days folks are cutting hay like mad. All of the grasses and trees and foliage paint the landscape with a multitude of gorgeous greens. There are deep, forest greens, and vivid emeralds along with bright, yellowy-greens and every shade in between! And the sky is so brilliantly blue that just stepping outside is like falling into a painter's palette replete with the freshest scents. It's absolutely heavenly. I'm so glad spring has finally taken hold; it's healing my battered and bruised heart and psyche. Spring; it does a body, mind and soul good!

P.S. We now have bats and lightning bugs, double yay!!

A Close Call

This is the back of the barn, or what's left of it after the thunderstorm of this morning. I woke up about 7 a.m. to the sound of thunder and the feel of my Spikey dog shaking in fear. The poor guy is terrified of thunder so I put my arms around him and spoke soothing words to help him get through the storm. But the storm didn't abate as was expected. It got a lot worse really fast and the wind intensified a great deal. A great deal.
On an intellectual level I knew I needed to get moving and get the dogs downstairs and unplug the computer and see to the windows and whatnot. But I have to confess something: for a very brief moment the wind was so strong that I thought there was no point in getting out of bed because I was going to die before I could make it down the stairs. That's how strong the winds were.
Here's a picture of a block ripped out of its concrete home.

Let me put this in perspective. I've lived in the Ozarks of southwest Missouri all of my nearly 32 years and I've had a lot of scares. We've had lightning strike 10 feet behind our house. We've had lightning run in on our phone line and blow up our computer. Granted, the computer just made a little pop and a puff of smoke but the simultaneous huge crash of thunder scared the holy hell out of all of us. We've had an ice storm that turned our homeland into a disaster area. There was a time when we had so much water running through our driveway that we couldn't get a car through it. And we've had tornadoes jump from street to street and just narrowly miss our house. But I have never seen or felt anything like this. The jury is out as to whether or not we had an actual tornado do this damage or if it was just strong winds. I honestly don't know if I care.

Tornado or not it did some pretty serious damage and it could have killed us. If this force had hit our house instead of the very back of the barn things could have been a lot worse. I've already said it several times today and I'll say it again: if I had been given a choice as to where the damage would be done that's the spot I would have chosen. The barn is the least important of our buildings and it sits the farthest away from the house. The back of the barn is a good 200 yards or so from the house and there's a big ass three car garage between it and the house. There's also a bunch of trees and a short fence between the house and the barn which somehow managed to keep a lot of the wreckage from reaching the house.

The winds were so strong for so long I was expecting the big front windows to get blown out at any second. I was waiting for windows all over the house to burst apart with load crashes. I was hoping the roof of the house would stay attached. After it was finally over I was expecting to find numerous dead critters when I stepped outside. As it was we did have one dead tree frog on the back porch. Amazingly enough it doesn't seem like any of the barn cats were hurt. I don't know exactly how many live back there as they rarely show themselves but I walked all over the area and found no bodies. You see that smashed up metal fence? That was a nearly 8 foot wide circle that surrounded our compost pile. You can just make out the roses this wreckage is smashing. But we can't move anything until the insurance adjuster shows up sometime in the next few days. It won't be quick as there have been so many claims called in to our local office. And while I'm not looking forward to the $1000 deductible I am very thankful that the damage wasn't any worse.

In the above image you can just make out part of the 80 feet of wiring that was pulled out.

I'm not entirely sure the depth of the situation has set in. I'm not ready for philosophical musings. The facts are too close to me right now. I am unable to clearly express myself about this. I haven't had time to gain perspective as I'm still kinda freaked out. I probably won't sleep for a while for fear of a similar rude awakening. Perhaps in the coming days, or months, I'll have something profound to say about the happenings of today. For now though, all I can come up with is "holy shit!" and "praise the gods!"

Finally Spring!

I saw my first hummingbird of the year the day before yesterday. I saw my first indigo bunting of the year today! It's finally warm enough that I've actually felt genuinely hot while busy working. The colors of spring are bursting forth all around us: pink and white dogwoods, the whites of cherry trees, the soft purple of lilac and the muted yet brilliant purple-pink of the little redbud trees along the driveway. According to Riverwolf all the bright colors of spring prove that April is the gayest month and I think he might be right. When else do we see such brilliant hues from the Earth Mothers palette?

The spring air is simply luscious! The scent of fresh cut grass and the spring flowering plants fill the air. Here on Windy Hill we always get a heavy dose of the perfume of spring and I'm really appreciating it. Our winter was so long I think I'd forgotten the wonders of the fresh green smell! There's nothing finer for me than walking the dogs in the yard and soaking up all the green. I let my hair fall down and the wind does its best to carry it away and I just love it! For an interesting and insightful wind-related blogging check out Aquila ka Hecate's Trees Genuflect Before the Wind.

While we've got a lot more gardening yet to do this spring I am happy to report that our radishes (above) and lettuce (below) are sprouting up nicely.


Our main garden still needs tilling as our 5 year old tiller has quit on us. We're hoping to borrow or rent a tiller without breaking the already stretched thin bank. My witch hazels along the back fence are gaining height which pleases me immensely. As per our custom we'll wait another 2 weeks before bringing out the plants that over wintered under the grow lights in the extra back bedroom. About that time we'll also purchase and plant our favorite potted plants like impatiens, petunias and marigolds. I'm so looking forward to it. This winter held on with a tight grip and I am very relieved to see it leave. I'm looking forward to dirt under my nails and fresh produce from the garden.

May your spring be blessed and portend a glorious summer!

Early Morning Silhoutte

Click for larger version.

Parrallels

Click for larger version.

Here's another evening image. I think these are called cirrus clouds, but I can't remember clearly. Given that I love photographing clouds above all other things I guess I should take some time to understand their different forms and functions.

Stars and Lights

Twinkle, twinkle little star
How I wonder what you are
Up above the world so high
like a diamond in the sky

I had a weird moment tonight. It was one of those moments when I wasn't quite sure what I was seeing. I was out in the backyard with the dogs, enjoying the crystal clear night sky. The moon wasn't quite visible yet so there were only stars as far as the eye could see. I live out in the country, or the suburbs of a very small town if I wanna get cheeky about it, so light pollution isn't much of an issue. Anyway, the weird moment came when I made it to the back of the yard and gazed at the brightest of the stars. And, I swear to the gods, it was blinking. And not just blinking bright, then dull, then bright again. It flashed white, white, blue, red. White, white, blue, red. Over and over in exactly the same order and rhythm.

I have never seen this before and I don't know why.

It was so startlingly different that the phrase "UFO" actually crossed my mind before passing away just as quickly as it arose. Then I wondered if all the fireplace smoke in the air could be playing tricks on my eyes. Then I came in and checked out a couple of my most favorite spacey websites thinking there must be some grand scientific explanation. And I couldn't find anything of the sort regarding the current space weather. So, I went back outside to see if I was hallucinating. And there it was again. The brightest, lowest star blinking at me; it may be Venus for all I know. But it appears like just any bright star, except it's blinking and flashing. White, white, blue, red. White, white, blue, red. So, I said to myself, "Self, you must be hallucinating". Then I got the idea to check out the other stars. And all of the bigger, brighter stars were blinking at me! The smaller, fainter stars just glimmered with their usual sparkle. But each and every one of the larger stars blinked in vividly different colors.

The only plausible idea I can come up with is that I have been in front of the computer, on and off, for about 4 hours now and my eyes are playing tricks on themselves. But that doesn't really fit the situation either. I've been a hardcore internet junkie since 1995 and never have I seen the stars like this. And I've been a dedicated moon and stargazer for most of my life. Why did I never see this before? Was I not looking close enough? Was I not looking long enough? Did the gods just now decide to reveal this to me? Or did someone spike my 2% milk when I was looking the other way?

Even as I write this a thought occurs: maybe I'm just getting old. Perhaps now that my eyes are a little weaker I am only seeing these flashes of colors as my eyes can't handle the overall brightness of the stars. Is that possible? I wish I knew. No, that's not entirely correct. I'd like to know the answer. But, mostly, I hope, and wish for it to continue.

Starlight, starbright
First star I see tonight
I wish I may, I wish I might
Have this wish I wish tonight

Of Divination and Smoke

For a long time I had something of a love/hate relationship with divination. Or, rather, a passing fancy/general dislike for said art. Try as I might I just cannot develop an interest in either Tarot or Runes. I was given a nice set of each as gifts years and years ago and tried for quite a while to "get a feel" for them. I read, I studied, I meditated, I drew cards and drew runes and drew and drew to no avail. I made interpretations based on the words and works of others. And I went with my gut and my pineal gland and made my own interpretations. I tried and worked and tried, for years. Eventually, I got tired of trying to force something that just wasn't happening and put the cards and runes aside and went on to seek another method. Perhaps my disinclination for cards and runes makes me an atypical, or uncool, witch but I don't really care.

My next method was by pendulum. I have a pendulum that I've dedicated some time and effort towards mastering. And, given its lack of specific images and its wonderful earthiness, it should work better for me. It's a very beautiful hematite pendulum with a nice, comfortable weight to it. But, like the cards and runes, I've had a very hard time developing a relationship with it so I put it away with the Tarot cards and the Runes. I eventually concluded that perhaps this witch just isn't made for divination at all. But I was wrong.

It was, purely by accident, that I discovered my preferred mode of divination: smoke scrying. I was under the influence of my favorite herb and got lost in the smoke of an incense stick. And I started to see things, visions some people would call them. Ideas, thoughts and symbols abounded! I learned more from, say, 6 months of smoke scrying than 2 years of working with cards or runes. Alas, I no longer have the opportunity to enjoy the blessings of my favorite herb (money: it's a bitch) so I haven't been able to to see things in smoke as I once did.

I've tried scrying with the smoke of other things but they just don't work. And, call it "sour grapes" if you will but, without my favorite sacred herb I can't seem to reach that "just right" head space anyway. The smoke from the fireplace just isn't the same. It's a different kind of smoke. Not to mention the fact that our open fireplace is in the living room with the damn television which can really play havoc with attempts to get in touch with one's higher self. And the little bit of smoke that a candle produces doesn't do it for me either. I need a thick stream of fragrant smoke that lasts, uninterrupted, for at least 20 minutes. And I need my Green Goddess.

So, I'm back to where I was before: stuck. I feel the call but haven't a method. I miss my smoke, in more ways than one. I'm a Cancer by birth and a very watery person whose emotions often run away from me. What's more, I'm a bipolar Cancer so my roller coaster emotions can make my life truly hellish. Up until I started smoking and then smoke scrying water, and emotions, dominated me (and, no, water scrying isn't for me either) and I felt the absence of the other elements quite keenly. Smoking and smoke scrying really helped me balance things out; I was on a much more even keel. There's a lot less fire, earth and air in my life than there was up until this time last year. This writing is one way of trying to accept that sad, depressing and infuriating fact. For over five years I had a lot of wonderful smoky air, via the herb and incense, in my life--and now it's gone. I guess I'm whining. I'm trying not to be bitter but can't really help it as my current financial hell was not of my doing.

When I think back on those beautiful and enlightening times I can't help but smile a bittersweet smile. It's sad, but a smile all the same. I guess I'm grateful for those times. So, I'll send a "thank you" out into the universe for the years when I did have the blessings of other elements in my life. I don't get to enjoy the benefits of the sacred herb anymore and there are no more visions. But that wasn't always the case. And for that I am thankful.

Crowned Cloud

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Three

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Rays from the Heavens

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Dark Clouds with Rays

This is an odd image but I like the sharp angles and the contrast between the light and the dark.
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Before the Storm

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